Monday, January 10, 2011


We had a convivial dinner with Bruno and Alphonse last night. Food was good, I had had most of a Bud Lite, and my lips got loose. I let down my guard and expressed an opinion.

Buckets are so useful!

Walruses love them some bucket,
Walrus with bucket

and are bereft without them.
walrus without bucket

Buckets are important when you're having a bad day,

and important for having a good day.

But, when you put something into a bucket, odds are good you'd rather not reach in and get it back out. Buckets are a one-way street. I suggest we stop creating bucket lists. I don't like them. Don't put your list in a bucket.

Then Bruno explained: it's a list of things to do before you kick the bucket. Ecch! Dislike more!

We still need a phrase for this list, and I propose:

  • Teeth list (things to do while I still have teeth)
  • Gam list (from Bruno - things to do while my legs are still smokin' hot), and the related
  • Cankle list (things to do while my cankles still look good)
  • Feather list (things to do before all the feathers come out of my coat - not suitable for vegans)
  • Wheel list (things to do while I can still get around)
  • Cataract list (things to do while I can see them without an aura)

Who's with me? Anyone? Anyone? What would you call this list if I banned Bucket List from the newly-censored Internet?

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Sue and Doug said...

interesting concept! are right in your own way..going to have to think on this one..add it to my before I die list??

Gail and Rick said...

Going to have to go with "Life List". Things to do while I still have one :)

¡Vizcacha! said...

Sue & Doug - right in your own way - hahaha! I am SO using that.

Gail & Rick - okay, I'm down with life list.

Anita said...

What if there was a hole in the bucket, dear Liza? Would that change your mind?

Malone said...

I like the "wheel list", but settled on Gail and Rick's Life List, while I still have one. that about sums it up. I love knowing that most stuff I buy now only has to last twenty years or so.

Anonymous said...

Well, one of my names for one of my 18-year-old cats is "fuzzbucket" (yeah, I know - but it makes for fun spoonerism!) so yes, I'd have to agree that what comes out is not something I really want to get back. :-P

Carolyn said...

I still have to vote for anything that includes the word "cankle" cause I can't help laughing every time I hear it.

Judy and Emma said...

So what are cankles anyway???

Anonymous said...

I don't have any use for a bucket list of regrets.

Annie said...

Judy, cankles are when there's no discernible difference between the calves and the ankles.

¡Vizcacha! said...

Anita - No! That would make the bucket that much worse! Yeech.

Maggie, I had to spoonerize the name to figure it out - haha! And, no. You get it back one way or another, but it's never a great thing, like getting a birthday gift, or having dinner made for you.

Carolyn, HA! We think you should call Bruno "Cankles" to see how long she'll laugh about it!

¡Vizcacha! said...

Dallas, I'm with you. Anyone with that kind of bucket needs to just tump it over onto the ground.

Dennis and Donna said...

Love the cankles list...How about the "Do It, Damnit!!" List.? OK, maybe that's a little crude...sorry 'bout that...

¡Vizcacha! said...

Not crude! I like it, because it indicates it should be done NOW, not before some cutoff date.

Four Windows with a View said...

I kind of like Gail and Ricks "Life List." It took me awhile to find out what a bucket list was and when I heard it was from a movie I rented it. I liked it.

Jennifer said...

Absolutely brilliant.

Jennifer (born with cankles)

Anonymous said...

I had never heard the term "bucket list" until very recently. Ya, Ya, I know - I've been living in a cave !! LOL

But I'm liking Dennis and Donna's "Do It Damn It List"

¡Vizcacha! said...

Malone, I think that blew my mind. I meant to respond and apparently shut down. Yeah. I'm still shut down! Blown, my mind.

¡Vizcacha! said...

Jeana, while I was doing EXTENSIVE research for this post, I ran across that movie - it looked good.

Jennifer, babies really ARE born with cankles, aren't they? Then they plump up and still have them. Cankles just get a bad rep, but they're sturdy. In high school, a boy asked me if I did a lot of roller-skating because my ankles were so substantial. And, he wasn't being mean, which is how I knew I had them.

¡Vizcacha! said...

Sassy, me neither. It didn't take me long to dislike it, I guess.

Cave list: things to do before I cave.

Jennifer said...

I think I got a bad set. I've got big cankles, but still hit the ground when they give out. It used to happen quite frequently when on stage in stilletos. (Few things are as humbling as that.)

¡Vizcacha! said...

And, I imagine a sensible pair of Doc Martens was out of the question.

dirtyduck said...

omgosh you are right...i mean its not really something to be overly proud of but still! you are right! nothing good is put into a bucket...(jk,lol id be proud:))

hahah not suitable for vegans, true true.

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