Tuesday, January 24, 2017

Towing the line: news from a mountain cabin

I was concerned. Brooding. Restive and restless. "How," I moaned, "can I have terrifying adventures while I'm living like someone's granny?"

We decided a great idea looked like driving into the mountains for a few days in-between obligations. Nothing can go wrong there, unless there is precipitation that bogs down the roads and turns them to mud-wrestling pits. 

Once one, hypothetically, gets one's Prius stuck in a muddy road, there is nothing to do but walk through the muck in the (theoretical) snow to the (metaphoric) cabin and warn one's (imaginary) girlfriend not to do what one has done.

If, academically, this happens to you, return to the scene not much later than dawn, while the road is solid, to rock yourself out of the situation. If you're smart enough to do this on a road that no one else would ever, in their craziest moment, consider using, it will be easy.

The crisis circumvented, we enjoyed the oncoming storms in the comfort of the cabin Eventually, we set a day to pack up and leave. In-between were some wildly exciting blizzard conditions: we laughed in Mother Nature's face. In one of the moments I wasn't laughing, I suggested we leave sooner, rather than waiting for the next storm, but we just got right back to laughing.

We decided to head back to Truth or Consequences. My driveway is tricky, and there was enough snow on the uphill incline to give me trouble. Janice was right behind with a bit more traction. When I crawled to a stop, I backed up to try again.

This move briefly confused Janice, who thought I had thrown myself into reverse and was utterly out of control. She backed up to accommodate me (get out of harm's way while harm was backing up), and caught herself on the embankment. 

Once we figured out extraction could only happen when the ground was frozen (late night - early morning), we could only wait. Once we figured out extraction was impossible in any weather, we could only wait more. And call AAA. Who sent a lowlander, warm-weather tow service who got himself into a lather when he saw the roads; he tucked tail and phoned in his regrets. He also informed AAA that we lived in an otherworldly hellscape that none may escape.

I have really terrific mental health, so I was most definitely not predicting the worst. While Janice worked herself to a nubbin to fulfill her next petsitting commitment, I enjoyed relaxing and meditating peacefully.

We asked advice of friends and neighbors. We asked for towing suggestions. A friend called a friend who knew a guy, and returned with an idea: J&Y Auto Service in Quemado. Janice phoned Jerry and explained our situation. He understood, agreed that local people knew the same thing: you have to get it while the ground is hard. He was willing to get out to us before the sun warmed our bodies and iced our hopes.

Except now AAA cringed to hear from us. OH NO! WE CANNOT HELP YOU UNTIL SPRING! their silver crosses held to the telephone. Janice tried to explain that we already had a participating service willing to come out, we just needed to set up a timed-tow, but the operator said "LALALALA I CAN'T HEAR YOU  NEVER CALL ME AGAIN  THANKS FOR CHOOSING AAA!"

I'm writing this from a fully-equipped home in Truth or Consequences, so all is well. I want to tell you I was relentlessly cheerful throughout, but my smile was a rictus. Getting off the mountain only took two days, but they were not unworried.

Does anyone want to buy a cabin? Carefree mountain living year-round! 




Sultry winch.









I knew you would get here, Janice.





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25 comments:

Lynda Garcia said...

This made me laugh (and maybe snort, but I'll never tell...)I love your style, thanks for sharing with us!��

Good Luck Duck said...

Thanks Lynda! I sorta wish I could just tell the story without experiencing it first.

Evie said...

Ha, laugh in the face of mother nature, and lalalalala, I can't hear you. Two of my favs.

Good Luck Duck said...

LOL Evie. :D

VtChris said...

Your description of your travails (but not the travails themselves) made me pee myself laughing. Endless good in endless ways.

Good Luck Duck said...

Endless good in endless ways!

Anonymous said...

I am laughing my ass offf -- after reading for the 2nd time. Got a little slimey, it sounds like. I've not gotten stuck before, but have flung mud up on top of the Jeep while careening from side to side on a road. I think 4WD moves to the top of your wish list...

Renee (Datil/North Ranch)

Good Luck Duck said...

The very top!

TravelBug Susan said...

Great storytelling as usual. I expect nothing less. And I agree too bad you have to experience it first...but I think that makes your creative juices flow.

Jodee Gravel said...

I (of course) fast-forwarded to the end to be sure you made it, before (literally) laughing out loud through your experience - with both vehicles and humans. If not 4 wheel drive, perhaps chains and floaties?

Good Luck Duck said...

Thanks, Susan. Yeah, I guess that's how it works. Terrible system.

Floaties? Like pontoons? That's not a bad idea, Jodee.

Contessa said...

All I can say is Oh, Lord!! Then comes to mind truth and then consequences.

Good Luck Duck said...

Yes! Consequences!

fairpan said...

And I thought you had found paradise!? Still paradise with a little adventure thrown in. Love your telling of your experiences and your story. Keep smiling.

Good Luck Duck said...

Fairpan, I'll call it Three Season Paradise.

Al Christensen said...

Glad you handled it with something resembling calm resignation.

Good Luck Duck said...

Yes. "Something resembling."

Peter + Beatrix said...

Aah...muddy days are here again ....and all you need is love, love, all you need is love. (and a rope)

Schadenfreude said...

Great memories were made!

Oh and just curious, what happens if your silver cross is gold and held to the telephone? :)

What's that old saying by Bob Dylan?
Take care of all your memories. For you cannot relive them.

Good Luck Duck said...

P&B, sometimes it's hard to remember which would be more useful.

We are not inju8injured by gold, Schadenfreude, so we just keep calling.

SwankieWheels said...

Time to consider buying some gravel???? And/or a 4 wheel drive vehicle????

SwankieWheels said...

And the cabin.... how much???

Good Luck Duck said...

This could be the answer, Swankie! In that case, off the market!

MFH said...

Take it from me...there's nothing like a good rictus. That and a good enema and you'll never have to worry.

I bet if that guy who was frozen alive had been in a '96 Tracker he'd have never gotten stuck.

Good Luck Duck said...

"Rictus?!? Damn near KILLED us!"

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